How many times have you rethought the one particular thing that got out of hand? The train you didn’t get on? Some people tend to talk about the past, for example, the person they loved that they let escape into the winds of the world, the job they didn’t get, or the journey they could have gone but didn’t. Indeed, our stories are relevant to our present. We build our own beliefs and worldviews around them.
Things that happen in our lives shape who we are, as well as what we are as human beings. And the responsibility for what happens to us is almost always entirely our own. After all, we go through life making choices based on what opportunities allow us. We make choices at work, at home, and with friends… Why not stop for a moment right now to consider how many decisions you really make in a single day?
We are constantly making choices between different options. As long as we have accumulated a little life experience, we will each be able to clearly remember moments in our lives when it seemed as if the whole world had stopped waiting for us to decide yes or no.
From the train after the “delay”
The lot has been thrown, and if things turn out badly, there are many ways to react to this. The accusing finger can point itself outside or inside, or blame karma or bad luck.
“I said no, because you instructed me to do so,” “I did not go in an interview, because you made me lose self-confidence,” “I did not have the courage …” And thus ends up in the head of the internal loop, which hangs satisfaction only lament its lost opportunity.
Once you have seized an opportunity and lost it, the next step is to take responsibility for your own decision. Analyze things and address the following negative emotions of your choice. People around you can offer you their own opinions and share what they think about it. Of course, they have the right to tell you their own opinion, but not the right to condemn you.
So the most important thing is to look at where you are now and focus on that. If you just keep looking at the horizon after the train has passed, you will feel things from the past, and not a single person has the power to change them. This way, you can end up filling your present moment with negatively charged emotions, such as sadness.
But the worst thing about this is by no means these feelings. The worst part is that when we are stuck in this way, we are not able to see all the new opportunities flowing up that are just as good or even better than the opportunities that have already been lost.
One and only?
If you’re a stubborn person for whom decision-making isn’t the strongest of the fields, you’re going to think too much in these critically crucial moments. If everything around you depends on your response to something, your thoughts will go into thanksgiving and your emotions will take over. But you can also take control of reality and steer yourself in a new direction with wisdom. To root it, check out the inspiring grains of wisdom borrowed from popular culture below.
- “We create our opportunities by asking for them.” Shakti Gawain.
- “To succeed, jump to opportunities as fast as you jump to conclusions.” Benjamin Franklin.
- “Opportunities are like sunrises. If you wait too long, they are gone. ” William Arthur Ward.
- “Overcome difficulties are overcome opportunities.” Winston Churchill.
These twitches have something in common. They speak of “opportunities” in the plural.
But on the other hand, the world has taught us that for some things we will only have one chance. Maybe someone claimed that for you too to get pressure on you to make a decision. But still… Be careful. This kind of social pressure can paralyze you and drive you completely stuck when it’s time to make a decision.
“Your great opportunity may be right where you are right now”
Napoleon Hill wrote the words above. He was one of the first writers in the field of self-help books. This idea, although not relevant to everyone in every situation, is a very good starting point in any case. Being late for a train – or being late to seize the opportunity – is not the end of the world. But it’s going to turn into a painfully long wait if you just stay to stand and watch the train leave after another, instead of paying attention to the incoming shifts .
Even if you miss an opportunity, you still have:
- All the options you have considered.
- Advice and instructions you have listened to.
- The value you have given to your own decision.
- Ability to take responsibility for your own actions.
- The ability to rebuild after feeling empty and losing something.
- A lesson you have internalized.
- An opportunity to look ahead and think about what you would do in a similar situation in the future.
We all get off the train sometimes – there are many of us on the train and others stay at the station. Sometimes the reason is that we choose another train, and sometimes our attention is distracted and we don’t have time for it. Or we might stumble just as we get on the train, or still be happy to sleep as it leaves early in the morning.
But keep this behind your ear: what matters is not the train leaving, but the things you have left after the train leaves, and what you do with these things after it has gone.