We know that human relationships fall apart, just like bones. However, those shards don’t always heal as fast as we think. Time alone will not cure us. Everything hurts and medicine is hard to find. So emotional intelligence can help us gradually close those inner scars.
Franklin D. Roosevelt said that when we reach the end of the rope, we have only one option: make a knot and wait. Indeed, ending something that a while ago kept us tied up and safe is now painful.
We feel like our whole being sinks into a vacuum. However, instead of being destined and rejected, we should make a knot of security and wait. That feeling of fear and helplessness will eventually go away.
Life is an unpredictable experience. We know that. It is a journey where it is impossible to avoid peaks and plains. Sometimes the journey is so painful that we start to think that we can no longer tolerate any setbacks, plot twists and changes. Whether we like it or not, we have been forced to use a basic survival package to get strong over these unpredictable events.
Emotional intelligence brings valuable resources that help us deal with unfavorable life events in a better way. Let’s dive a little deeper into this.
Emotional intelligence that heals the wounds caused by our relationships
Using emotional intelligence to heal wounds caused by failed relationships, unexpected losses, or other traumatic events gives us two very specific tools. The first is the ability to manage pain in a healthy and creative way. The second is to revitalize (and develop) our ability to heal in order to continue to enjoy positive relationships and interactions.
The emotional intelligence created by many of the above events traps us in very negative behavior and thoughtful formulas. We are also at risk of suffering from a psychological illness such as depression or anxiety.
In addition, it affects the development of our human relationships. We stop trusting other people and enter marked periods of frustration where it is very difficult to re-establish strong and healthy bonds with other people.
So many people who come to therapy do so precisely because of emotional interpersonal problems. Many patients experience the shadow of almost constant rejection. Others suffer from unrequited love and many are still stuck in a harmful and toxic relationship without knowing what to do.
For this reason, we should take a closer look at these methods, which can help us better cope with such situations.
Uniting our feelings in a healthy way
Our wound-healing emotional intelligence tells us that we must learn to connect with our inner universe in a healthier way. Usually, we focus exclusively on our pain when faced with a loss or a complex mind-moving situation. We tend to focus on suffering or disappointment that ultimately blurs, hurts, or prevents us.
- With this approach, we are only widening the gap of bitterness.
- We know that such negative emotions exist and that they have a very specific origin. So when we recognize and accept them, it is time for us to channel and change them so that we can use them to our advantage rather than against us. We need to regulate them, not let them stop us. We need to give them dynamism so we can respond to them.
- If we feel angry, we need to channel it into something positive. When we experience grief, we need to alleviate it until its weight decreases day by day. If we experience fear because of a harmful relationship, we should ask for help and support to face that source of anxiety so that we feel safe.
We must remember that the disorganized and chaotic accumulation of emotions causes us to show dysfunctional patterns of behavior. So we need to use emotional intelligence to heal, create order, channel, and use emotions to our advantage.
Feeling empathy for oneself and personal safety
Wound-healing emotional intelligence usually places special emphasis on a very specific part of empathy. We refer to that ability as we unite with ourselves and see our own wounds in a more compassionate and careful way.
- After a resignation or any other painful or traumatic event, you must restore your personal safety. That is, a firm, open, and conscious determination to repair every wounded corner and every fragmented piece through forgiveness. Self-love is a key factor in moving forward day by day.
- If we focus exclusively on our own suffering, we limit ourselves to walking in a circle. After all, the pain ends us slowly. It forces us to take full control and fill the space, fiber, and recess of each of our realities. That is something we should avoid. Be empathetic with yourself and create an action plan.
Spiritual healing serves as a fuel for personal growth
People feel good when they focus on the emotions and senses as they occur. It has to be a smooth process, something that evokes that innate healing intelligence that exists in the body and mind. It is a process that is similar to digestion and where we can get every experience to act as a fuel for personal growth.
If we allow rage, disappointment, or despair to remain stagnant, we become ill. We end up suffering rejection, unrequited love, or anxiety caused by an unhappy human relationship. These feelings need to be processed in a healthy way so that we can become stronger and have the opportunity to grow mature and responsibly.
In summary , wound-healing emotional intelligence is a necessary source to better deal with difficult situations. It’s a way to tame our fears so we can remember our values and our arrogant need to get over and move forward before it’s time.
We have to say that this is not an easy process. It is not something we can achieve in a couple of days or months. Effective use of these methods often refers to a change in consciousness that creates a complete change that will no doubt reach every area of our lives. Because everything changes when you understand and get your emotions to work for you.