The Definition Of Narcissism – Self-love Or Self-love?

The definition of narcissism - self-love or self-love?

We are fascinated by humble and brave people. We are fascinated by people who do not give up. We are inspired by people who know where they are going, no matter how many obstacles they have to overcome on their way to their goal. Above all, we like people who don’t even know what surrender means. We like people who at some point in their lives have learned to love themselves. We hear talk of narcissism, but is the definition of narcissism self-love or self-love?

It is good to have family members or friends with the above qualities. However, it is even more important that we also become those people. People who know what they want and know they deserve it. In the society around us, however, those who dare to say things like this out loud are easily branded narcissists.

Self-love is possibly the most essential foundation for our mental well-being. By living in this way, we ensure our survival on both a physical and mental level. With good self-esteem, we can cope with varying degrees of success in the ups and downs of life. It helps us navigate in the midst of a complex society around us, characterized by at least as many grievances as those we can perceive within ourselves as well.

Sometimes, however, we get a clear feeling that “loving ourselves” and saying out loud that we deserve and are able to achieve something is just an indication of extremely bad taste. We run the risk of making many feel complacent, selfish – and, of course – narcissistic.

The truth is that a selfless, noble, and humble soul are absolutely necessary. However, as we strive for balance in our mental well-being,  we must also invest in other, sometimes forgotten aspects, such as self-esteem, self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-esteem.

A lion crowned with flowers

Often neglected is the healthy definition of narcissism: loving ourselves

The definition of narcissism we internalize prompts us to reject the whole idea immediately after hearing it. What if, however, we said that the definition of narcissism also includes the healthy side that we all need to some degree? Interestingly, each of us has been programmed since birth with the need to love ourselves. It is part of our genetics, which in our later lives we end up rejecting or silencing for many different reasons so that we do not have to bear the social shame it brings.

In order to understand that need, we just need to keep an eye on babies and 3-4 year olds. Their behavior is characterized by just that type of narcissism. Their only interest is in satisfying their own basic needs, whether physical or mental. They don’t do it out of selfishness. Their motive is first and foremost survival, and then their physical, mental, and social development.

Later, this instinct might lead us to one of these three paths:

The first is the child’s increasing experience of not being worthy of love. He bases this belief on interaction with his environment. His mental needs are not being met. This in turn leads to a slowly advancing spiral in which his self-esteem decreases step by step until his self-esteem is completely destroyed. If we believe that others do not love us, we will not love ourselves either.

Whole narcissism

Another aspect is just as negative: excessive narcissism.

This means that the child develops an extreme need to receive attention and expressions of gratitude from the adult. She needs constant and ongoing support to feel valued and accepted. Gradually, as he grows, this remains his greatest need: his endeavor is always to be the center of attention, and he only takes care of himself.

There is one more aspect that is the most balanced of these.

An individual has been able to maintain a healthy narcissism during childhood or the years before adolescence and understands that loving oneself is essential to one’s own survival. Thus, instead of demanding constant attention or support to feel valued, he has managed to develop a strong self-esteem. Thanks to this, he sees himself as capable, dignified, courageous, and worthy of the fulfillment of his own dreams.

People who love themselves achieve what they want

People who know how to achieve what they want are not selfish, narcissistic, or smug. In fact, they are generally quite modest. They do not usually make public their plans, nor do they carry large posters proclaiming their strengths or abilities. Those who are extreme narcissists would do just that, because what matters to them is what they look like. Extreme narcissists talk a lot, do little, and use others to reach their goals.

People with good self-esteem love themselves in a fearless and healthy way. They live their lives in complete silence without attracting attention. However, their eyes are always attached to the horizon. They strive to achieve their goals no matter what others say, think, or do.

Woman and wolf face to face

Neuroscience shows that the area of ​​our brain where we develop and plan goals for our lives is the frontal lobe. The structure of this, in turn, is connected in a complex way to our emotions, but above all to the part of the brain that deals with our personality. It favors strong character traits as well as an understanding of habits, perseverance, and personal effort.

All of this shows us once again that only fearless individuals with good self-esteem are the ones who will eventually reach heights. They care little about what others say, for they are full of energy leading to success. It is present deep in their hearts, in the area they care for on a daily basis.

Photos: Liz Clemens

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Back to top button