Your partner will leave you, and you will feel like he has taken a piece of you with you that you will never get back. A family member or friend will die, and you feel like nothing will ever be the same as before because you lost them. When you surrender to something completely, you will never return to wholeness.
If you have truly loved someone, you know that when that person is no longer in your life, he or she will take the piece with you. A small piece of your heart will disappear and never burn. A feeling of emptiness that only time can help you fill.
It’s hard to say goodbye when you want to say “stay”
We are by nature emotional beings, and while it is really difficult to avoid feeling certain emotions, it is possible to control their duration and intensity using mental intelligence.
Mentally intelligent people know what their own strengths and abilities are, and they have learned to listen and understand others with empathy. Therefore, even in moments of grief, they have faith in the future, and they know that with time they can get over anything.
When a loved one dies, you can do nothing but accept the loss. When you’re resigning from someone, even when things have changed, it’s important to accept the situation, be realistic, and look for a way to manage the emotions that start pushing to the surface.
Surrender and affection
In your relationships with your partner, friends, and family, there should be a limit to how much you give in so you can avoid mental attachment. Walter Riso says in his book Letting Go Without Anesthesia that in an addictive relationship, you exchange your soul in exchange for an imaginary sense of security and pleasure. Riso defines attachment as an obsessive bond with an object, idea, or person based on the following four false beliefs: that it is permanent, that it makes you happy, that it brings you security, and that it brings purpose to your life.
If you experience this kind of affection, you will never be prepared for a loss and you will not accept that things will change, you will lose someone, or you will resign from something. Loss makes you feel empty, without direction.
Affection corrupts. It makes you unhappy and prevents you from respecting yourself and your values. You are afraid of losing what you want, losing your sense of happiness, because you are putting all your energy and resources into another person and putting yourself and everything you really like in the background.
The key is to learn to let go
Throughout your life, your ability to give and be generous is part of who you are as a person. However, it is important that you have the tools to manage losses through integrity and accept that change is a part of life.
Saying goodbye to a person, a job, or a relationship is something we must constantly face, and it is important to face these moments with courage and intelligence. This ability is necessary so that you can avoid the excessive suffering and negative experiences that follow the loss.
Let your pain go. There are still several people who are ashamed of crying in public, suppressing their feelings and words. But to let go, it’s important to let go of the pain. Cry as much as you need to, but without isolating yourself. Talk to your friends, tell how you feel, and listen to their advice.
Focus on yourself. For once, be selfish and spend a lot of time looking at yourself without feeling the weight of your conscience. What do you really like? What do you enjoy? When you think about your needs and what really matters to you, above all that another person or situation meant to you, you can let go and give yourself security and faith in yourself.
Take care of yourself. Focusing on yourself should also involve rewarding yourself and taking care of yourself. If you feel like you want a vacation, now is the time. You get perspective, distance, and the ability to see in a new way. Remember that new situations bring with them new things, and there is always something to gain: freedom, learning, the ability to overcome obstacles, and so on.